This morning, it was really cold. As you know my day begins at 2.30 am but this morning it started at 3 because I was feeling too cold to get out of bed. Needless to say that my entire schedule went off badly. As I made a pot of tea for my husband’s flask, I heard gargles and other baby sounds coming from the room. Of course, if I had woken up earlier, I would have been done with the tea already. I ran to the room, put the dummy into her mouth and bribed her to keep quiet just a little longer so that I could finish off with the tea and iron.
She kept quiet and I continued to the kitchen to fill the flask. I started to iron, I just had the shirt to iron when my baby girl decided that she could not wait anymore. I made her milk hot and fed her. Already 3.40 am. I burped her and put her down and then I ran to complete ironing the shirt. By 3.55 am I am back in the bed but my little girl refuses to go to sleep.
Now, its a cold cold morning and my big, warm teddy bear husband is in the bed. Cuddled and snuggled and looking so good to curl up in his arms but my little girl refuses to give me that joy. After a countless number of times of pushing the dummy into her mouth, she quietened down. I could feel my husband behind me reaching out for me clearly wanting to hold me close.
Luckily I got 5 minutes with him before his alarm rang at 4.15 am. He held me close and gave me lots of love. I felt really special.
I love being a mother. But I feel that motherhood does not mean being perfect or being superwoman. We, as mothers, want to do everything perfectly for our family and if we feel that we cant do something or we get irritated at something, we immediately feel guilty. This morning when my daughter was fussing and my husband was reaching out for me, I was getting a bit tired. I felt guilty immediately and cursed myself out for being the worlds worst mother.
Sometimes you just miss that time with your partner. Being close to him is something that makes my heart feel so happy and I love being in his arms. Before he could leave for work this morning he held me for a very long time. He kissed me and told me that he would miss me. I miss my husband and it hasnt even been a day yet that I haven’t seen him, just a couple of hours.
He is a great man and I love him lots.
Anyway, point is, its okay if you’re not perfect, you get upset or frustrated sometimes. You’re a mother and that in itself is being superwoman. There’s nothing more that you can try to be. But even though our lives revolve around our kids, we miss the loving touch of our husbands sometimes. So always make a little time, even if its those 5 little minutes to love each other. It will make you feel a whole lot better.